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[21 Jul 2007|09:45pm] |
i haven't touched this journal in months. it used to be that i would read everyone else's every day, and just not update mine, but then i stopped looking at it all together. depressing, i know. so i won't be at all surprised when this goes completely unread, which in all reality is what most people would hope for in a journal entry. but then again those people probably don't put their journal on the internet... anyways.
i cannot even begin to describe the intense emotions that i'm feeling after reading the last harry potter. i have read hundreds of books, and i'm fairly certain that this is the best book i've ever read. it absolutely amazes me that that woman can have so much talent, that she can have millions and millions of people hanging onto the edge of their seats over something that's competely imaginary. that is supreme skill & i wish i had it. i won't say anything about the book considering it only came out at midnight and most sane people haven't read it yet. you have no idea the restraint i'm putting on myself here. yeah, yeah, yeah i know - my geek is hard core showing right now but i really don't care. i've never really been one for hiding my geek like tendencies. seriously, a part of me died when i finished reading that book. it's over, this part of my life that i've been completely obsesssed with for sooo many years is over. i can't handle the finality of it. sigh.
on another note, i'm moving 900 miles away one month from tomorrow. if that's not terrifying, i don't know what is. it's really just now starting to sink in, having been watching my mom write out lists of all the things i'll need and all of the stuff that we have yet to do (which is everything.) i have no idea what made me so obsessed with getting the hell out of here, but now it's really time to do it. am i excited - yes. nervous - yes. sad - getting there. it still just seems unreal to me that i'm leaving every single person i know. even though i can guarantee you right now that leaving my family and my best friend is going to screw with me tremendously when i'm actually up in connecticut.
i turned my cell phone off at midnight so no one would talk to me while i was reading harry potter. i'm done with harry potter and i have no intention of turning my cell phone back on. not normal, right?
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[24 Feb 2007|11:17pm] |
Truth or Dare. it's a common enough game, right? well everyone decided to play it last night at the hotel we were at for jodi's birthday. i, however, refused to play. does this shock anyone, hopefully not. i just think it's weird that i'll be eighteen in two months and am STILL unnaturally secretive and private about almost every single aspect of my life. so much so that i refuse to play this stupid game that people have been playing since second grade and the worst dare imaginable was to lick a door knob, or kiss the wall. so really, what's my deal? i really want to know.
and reeeeaaaalllly, who knows anything about me? no one. sure, everyone knows the unimportant stuff that you can figure out by talking to me for ten minutes, but other than that, nada. my best friends, my sisters, my parents - - i don't even tell them anything. i've become ridiculously skilled at turning any conversation away from me without anyone noticing the shift. why the hell did i choose that as my stealthy ninja skill of choice? i need to take a psych class, seriously.
and i bet if you read through every entry from the past three years of this journal, this will be one of the most in-depth public updates.
i personally plan on blaming it on a lack of trust in general, but who knows. someone else tell me what's up because clearly, i have absolutely no idea.
edit: & to add insult to injury, i just discovered that i am incapable of correctly labeling a map of the United States on the first try, that is just pathetic.
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| RIP Ashley, RIP. |
[20 Feb 2007|11:04pm] |
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i just found out that a girl i used to work with at sears is dead. she ODed on heroine yesterday and died. she was only nineteen. that is so sad. she was crazy, and occasionally freaky, but she always made me laugh. this is absolutely nuts. i hope it was worth it ashley.
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[15 Feb 2007|10:26pm] |
why might you ask, do i have skinned knees and knuckles, a freakishly stiff neck, a very large bruise on the top of my forehead and a cut across my nose? well i'll just have to answer. it's because i blacked out today while standing in my kitchen, and then proceeded to fall and smash my head/face onto the kitchen counter before landing on the hard floor. sounds like a good time, right? yeah, i know.
i'm assuming i blacked out because i gave blood earlier today. which, by the way, didn't hurt as bad as it did last time. last time they took it out of my left arm, this time they did the right. the lady told me that my veins were too tiny in my left arm to do it again, lovely. whatev.
let's see, what else? i only had two days of school this week thanks to an ice storm. now the snow days aspect was fun. what was not fun was when everyone's power went out HALF WAY THROUGH GILMORE GIRLS! i was so pissed, i didn't even care that i was trapped in my pitch black basement, i only cared about the fact that i was missing my show, and then i missed Veronica Mars on top of that, bad timing electricity, bad timing.
by the way, i saw Music and Lyrics and it was really good, so i think you should probably go see it.
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[22 Jan 2007|10:28pm] |
i want to see Blood & Chocolate, i'm pretty sure that makes me queer. oh well. what's with that title, by the way? weird, yes. random, yes.
tomorrow i have to be at school at like 6:55. i'm going to die. i'm never at school before 7:10, ever. i'm very accustomed to always being late, now i'm going to be at school TWENTY minutes early, woah.
tomorrow is my friend heather's 18th birthday. i heart heather. she's the reason i have to wake up early, by the way.
i'm very excited for tomorrow. why, you ask? well because tomorrow is the return of both Gilmore Girls and Veronica Mars. that makes me happy, and sad all at the same time. happy that they're coming back, sad that it excites me so much. but, i figure it's okay because i don't watch tv much other than tuesday nights. so i relent.
today my friends decided to start a rumor that i was pregnant, just to see how far the rumor would spread. they thought it was amusing. luckily, no one believed it. well, some of the juniors did that don't know me very well, but i don't care about them. my friends are weird, but i love them anyways.
my rogue eyeball stopped twitching, sweet.
boys speak in rhythm, and girls in code.
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[16 Jan 2007|07:14pm] |
okay so about the whole eye twitching thing, it's still doing it. but today miss gelter told me that it's because of stress and it happened to her last year and it lasted for TWO MONTHS. if this doesn't stop for two months, i'm totally clawing it out.
my speech today went well. not only did i last the minimum of eight minutes, i think i may have gone over twelve. i just cannot find a happy medium. oh well.
i only have to go to school for an hour tomorrow. that's fun. it's because i don't have a 2nd or 3rd bell exam. today i was talking to mr hickman(principal) and he was telling me that i have to come to school all day regardless of my lack of exams. i was like yeah right. and i told him so, i then proceeded to tell him that i had every intention of being sick tomorrow. oops. it slipped out, he made me mad. but then ms miracle(attendance) told me only to come for the two hours that i have classes. luckily the office people love me.
i have to go to dairy queen now and visit my wetard. byeeeee.
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[15 Jan 2007|03:33pm] |
my left eye has been twitching nonstop since thursday. i'm about to claw it out of my head. it's that annoying. and i'm fairly certain, not normal.
are we all aware that bubblelicous now makes chocolate gum? that's disgusting. now, i personally am not a fan of chocolate, but i'm pretty sure that even if i DID like chocolate, that would be revolting. that's not normal either. chocolate gum, i mean, really. i tried Skittles gum today though. it was weird. i wanted to swallow it because it tasted like skittles, and you're supposed to swallow skittles. so my mouth had a pretty nasty fight with my brain's instincts. the mouth won though, you know, incase you were wondering.
tomorrow i have to give my SEAP (Senior Exit Action Project) powerpoint presentation. it has to be at least eight minutes. to most people that doesn't seem too horrible. to me however, that is eternity. i don't do timed speeches well. why, do you ask? well, because i talk ridiculously fast. and that's on a normal basis. get me talking when i'm nervous, and you're lucky to even understand what i'm saying. so really, eight minutes? yeah right. damn my speed talking tendency.
i still haven't heard from uconn's financial aid department yet and it's starting to piss me off, and make me anxious. and i really do not need any additional anxiety in my life. they just need to tell me how much money they're giving me and be done with it. then i can call them and tell them that i need more, and i'll scream at someone, and life will be normal again. but until then, my name is kandice, and i am extraoridinarily anxiety ridden. (says hi to the support group and sits down.)
aaaaaand i hate exams. just thought i'd put that out there.
okay, i'm done complaining now.
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| who's a Husky? |
[23 Dec 2006|10:03pm] |
i got into UCONN! i got into UCONN! i got into UCONN! i got into UCONN! i got into UCONN! i got into UCONN! i got into UCONN! i got into UCONN! i got into UCONN! i got into UCONN! i got into UCONN! i got into UCONN! i got into UCONN! i got into UCONN! i got into UCONN! i got into UCONN! i got into UCONN! i got into UCONN! i got into UCONN! i got into UCONN! i got into UCONN! i got into UCONN! i got into UCONN! i got into UCONN! i got into UCONN!
and i've never been this excited in my life.
merry christmas to me.
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[15 Dec 2006|10:08pm] |
today i gave blood for the first time ever. i was so afraid, i was fairly certain i was going to die. i started crying before they did it, and i'm not a crier, at all, so that's really saying something about how afraid i was. so they do the finger prick and all of that stuff, just to find out that my temperature is .2 degrees too high. so i had to sit there for like 20 minutes to see if it would go down, it did. i had mixed feelings about that. so i gave blood, and i thought it hurt, and i think i broke marel's hand. blah.
first i donate all of my hair, then i donate my blood. i am on a roll.
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[07 Dec 2006|12:09am] |
all of my hair is gone.
i just cut 10 inches off to give to Locks of Love. short hair is weird.
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[04 Dec 2006|04:38pm] |
so i have this shoebox in my closet that's filled with random pictures that have accumulated over the years. today i had to look through it because my friend michelle wanted some pictures for a present she's making. this box has pictures in it going from elementary school to just a few weeks ago. that is a very funny box. it's ridiculous to see how much people have changed. but ridiculous in a hilarious kind of way. good times.
let's see... i went to OSU to do the whole campus tour last thursday. i think the campus is really ugly, but i'll go there if i don't get into UCONN. (which, by the way, is excruciating, having to wait to see if i got in or not.) but anyways, while i was there i met my future husband. seriously, it was love. he was my tour guide. ha. and mindy found her future husband too. so, ya know. fate.
everyone's been turning 18 lately. that's scary. that means you're an adult and it's time to start growing up. i'm not sure if i'm ready for that. i'm going to boycott the whole loss of childhood thing, that's crap. you don't have ALL of your rights when you turn 18, so i say stay a kid until you're at least 21. then you can at least legally drink and be an adult at the same time.
lola is dating a guy that's 6'11". that's really really freaking tall. i can't even imagine. he has to duck through every doorway, and his neck probably always hurts from having to constantly look down at EVERYONE. because hi, he's 6'11". what a beast.
okay so tonight's a full moon apparently and all of this weird shit happened at school today:
1] the water heater like blew up somewhere in school which caused about 3-4 classrooms to completely flood.
2] there was a very strange ping-ing noise in miss gelter's class all day.
3] the computers in the library stopped working.
4] the heat stopped working in some of the rooms.[it was 17 degrees out this morning.]
so yeah, freaky.
Your horoscope for
Monday, December 4, 2006
The value of a relationship you've been working on recently will come to light now, as the full moon shows you the results of your efforts. You might improve an old friendship, or watch a romance ripen into full bloom. This could also be a good day for your work life. You might start a seasonal job you interviewed for recently, or collect your first holiday season pay tinsel.
none of that happened. my horoscopes are always shit.
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[27 Nov 2006|11:09pm] |
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i got my ACT score back. let's just say it wasn't a 31, and i was very sad. i suck. :[
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| don't let me fall, i'll break, what a mess i'd make. |
[20 Nov 2006|08:00pm] |
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i just got done applying to uconn. i am ridiculously excited, and incredibly nervous, and afraid.
if i don't get in, i will seriously be miserable.
my parents' 25th wedding anniversary is tomorrow. that is a ridiculously long time. way to go parents.
uconn :]
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| my hands are at your throat, and i think i hate you. |
[09 Oct 2006|08:51pm] |
i've decided to grace livejournal with my presence, a month after the last entry. i suck. i really do. oh well.
so today was stressful. i filled out this really long scholarship application and wrote an essay and biography and what not, and i most likely won't even get the stupid scholarship and wasted an entire day for nothing. oh the things i do for money.
also today i bought my ticket for story of the year and anberlin on saturday. i'm going with jodi, and i'm excited about that. i have to school her in the ways of anberlin over the next few days, it shall be a fun lesson. boys speak in rhythm and girls in code. mmm hmmm.
yesterday when i was leaving work, i walked out into the parking lot and completely forgot where i had parked my car. i walked around the entire freaking parking lot looking for my car. i had never done that before. and of course the one time i've ever done it, my parents and grandma were sitting in the parking lot watching me walk around and laughing at me. sigh.
so i all of a sudden have all of this free time, and i quite frankly have no idea what to do with it. so i've been watching hours and hours of tv. i'm seriously making myself ill. it's not even normal. i watch an hour of sabrina, then ever wood, then gilmore girls, (then on tuesday another episode of gilmore girls, then veronica mars.) that is absolutely revolting and pathetic. i'm so used to working every day, i don't even know what to do with myself. i'm probably killing my eyeballs.
i have a serious need to do laundry, i have no clean clothes left. i think i'll go do that. kthanksbye.
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| aaron c's in the house, come get it, what, say it again. |
[12 Sep 2006|06:23pm] |
i have an aaron carter song stuck in my head from like YEARS ago. that song about him having a party when his parents go to his aunt's house. "i'm gonna be picked off my family tree." hahahahaha.
whenever my cell phone is sitting on my computer desk, and someone calls me or texts me, the speakers get all static-y. you know, incase you were wondering.
umm let's think. i started school since i last updated. nothing exciting, nothing fun, just blah.
when i was at school yesterday, someone felt the need to point out that i never match. it made me laugh, mostly because it's 100% true. matching is so far down on my priority list, it's practically not there at all. my outfit that sparked the comment was a long green shirt under an orange polo, all of which was under a grey and pink jacket. i'm sweet. oh yeah, my earrings were purple.
okay people, this is the most important test of our friendships absolutely ever. help me write my UCONN essay, i beg of you.
what unique qualities do i have, and how will these qualities benefit UCONN?
please, please, please help me out people, because quite frankly, right about now, i'm drawing a total and complete blank on my traits that are appealing. probably because i have none, oh well.
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[21 Aug 2006|12:11pm] |
it's been two weeks since i've updated this thing and the whole grandpa-brunch thing seems like it happened yesterday. no wonder this summer freaking flew by. geeze. i don't want to think about how fast summer went though, because then i will only be reminded that school starts in eight days. gross. yeah, it's my senior year, and i'm supposed to be super excited, but i'm not. i'm kinda just like, whatever. probably not normal. i've just noticed how often i don't speak in full sentences. sorry if that annoys people.
so jodi and mindy have officially started to ditch me for their boyfriends. i can not even begin to describe how much that pisses me off. i'm not saying that they just spend too much time with them; they're actually ditching me. as in "kandice, you are going to the festival tonight with us whether you like it or not, we'll pick you up at 9:45." & then never showing up, or calling. then finally, being the stealthy ninja that i am, i text jodi and said something along the lines of "i'm bored, what are you doing." only to discover that they're what? oh yeah, they're at the festival with brun and jason. umm, joke? no. i was freaking pissed. blah. blah. blah.
i went canoing last week. me: canoing. if that image doesn't make you crack up laughing all on it's own, you either don't actually know me, or if you do, not very well. my partner was heather coorey and we sucked so badly that it was hilarious. we were constantly running into the sides of the river, or into trees, or into other people(half the time they were people that we didn't know). yeah good idea to put me, the least active, most indoor, biggest wimp, in a canoe with someone who isn't even 5 feet tall. this matching lead to us sucking terribly. but it was still a lot of fun, because i love heather, and she made me laugh the whole time.
my check this week is going to be for almost 300 dollars, i'm very excited. i enjoy money, and now i can buy myself another pair of roos. speaking of money, i have to go get ready to go make more. i work a lot. gag.
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[06 Aug 2006|11:51pm] |
i work a lot. i worked 5 out of 7 days this week. it's weird having gone from doing nothing constantly to always being busy. working makes a person tired too. sheesh.
okay so before i get into the main point of this entry i'll have to do a little background story to help further understand later. i don't like my dad's side of the family. that sounds harsh, i'm aware, but it's not just me, my sisters and my mom don't either. let's take for instance my grandpa on my dad's side: he sends a birthday card and christmas card every year ( with my name spelled wrong i might add) but other than those cards i haven't talked to the man since i was about ten. he knows absolutely nothing about me, i know nothing about him, and i don't mind the whole situation.
today however, we broke the barrier. me and my sister Kari went out to brunch with the man and his wife. they're uber loaded and completely stuck up and snotty people, so naturally they took us to their country club where everything we ate probably cost like 25 dollars a piece. so while we're at this place all of these people keep coming up and talking to my grandpa and being all " hi mr whalen, how are you doing?" and then, i swear to you this is no joke, he turned to introduce us and he said "these are my grand daughters, this is _________" and he just sat there. that idiot forgot my name. now that's a relationship for you. the entire meal was awkward and blah. it was just weird. it's like, hi, im 17 and i've spoken to you 3 times in my life. whatever.
oh yeah, and also while i was there i bit into this danish type thing and it was filled with mold. no that is not a joke. it was filled with mold. i saw it and i thought i was going to puke. it was truly a great day.
oh oh oh and before we left kari and i were absolutely freaking out. we were so scared. we are an incredibly anxiety ridden family. kari has pills that relax you so that you don't freak out and have anxiety attacks. (prescribed, don't worry.) we both took one before he got there so we wouldn't freak out or whatever. the entire time i was there i felt like i was high. i was so freaking out of it. it was funny. or it was to me at least.
i'm going to sleep now. peace homies.
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[27 Jul 2006|01:04am] |
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man, oh man: look at me, updating twice in one week. this is slightly amusing to me, because if you go back two years, or even just last year, i updated this thing like it was my job. now it's more of a random, once a month if you're lucky type deal. i do however, get on here every single day and read everyone else's.
so the back-to-school commercials are starting back up again. i don't think i like that. summer went very fast this year. plus i'm not sure about how i feel regarding the whole senior year issue. excited, yes. but other things are mixed in there too.
picking senior pictures are annoying. i can't pick the five poses AND all of my possible yearbook shots are butt ugly, of course. what a pain. i'll just make someone else pick them for me, because i'm sick of staring at pictures of myself.
my life is incredibly boring these days. why you ask? i will tell you, because my three best friends, mindy, jodi, and jason, have all decided to get brand new relationships going at the exact same time. so they're all in that phase where they're practically obsessed and constantly with that person. so every single person that i hang out with is always busy. so i'm always bored. how annoying.
so warped tour was today. i had absolutely no desire to go to this one. the line-up sucked in my opinion.
i have to read Jane Eyre and some other book, plus write a paper about them and i don't even have the books yet, let alone read them. i hate summer homework. blah.
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[24 Jul 2006|10:29pm] |
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i am constantly telling myself that i will write more often in this lj. i don't though. i suck, i know.
so last week my parents and i went to UCONN. it was absolutely amazing. i loved it, and i really want to go there next year. it was really really pretty, and absolutely enormous. it's the number one public school in New England, and i kid you not, it has a 7 ACRE library. i nearly fainted when i went inside. i can't really explain what i liked about it so much, it just felt right. i would post the pictures i took but i am completely stupid when it comes to computers and cameras and pretty much everything else involving technology, so i can't. trust me though, it was awesome.
i got my senior pictures back today. they make me want to vomit. they're a tad bit on the revolting side. i am the least photogenic person alive. rarrr.
i started work today. now i love shopping at Target, but working there is not as enjoyable. for starters, red makes me look like a queer. i can't pull off red. second, i suck at bagging things. i really do. it seems like an east enough concept; take the item, place it in the bag. but noooooo, i can't get the bags to open up enough, or something fits funny, or you put too much/too little in the bags. what a joke. i say throw everything back into the cart and throw every individual item back into your car, that would certainly make my life easier. but oh well, work isn't supposed to be a party, or something, i don't know.
i've been sleeping in my basement for like the last week, because despite our air-conditioned home, my room gets so freaking hot, i can't sleep. and i'm a touchy enough sleeper as it is, if i'm hot, there's absolutely no way i'll sleep. so i sleep in the nice cool basement with a fan blowing directly on me. now i like the couch more t han my bed. this presents a problem. once school starts back i'll have to start sleeping in my own room again, and i can't take the magic couches with me. ( they were dubbed the magic couches because it's nearly impossible to lay on them without falling asleep. )
i watched Two Weeks Notice last night and i've decided that it's my favorite movie of life. it's absolutely hilarious. if you've never seen it, i highly recommend it.
okay, i'm done rambling now.
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kand_ice's journal